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← CHAPTER OVERVIEW

Are you ready to face yourself?

Dear Creatrix,

How are you today?

How are your plans coming along?

Before we start to look at them in more detail, I’d like to take a moment to recognize where we are right now.

Working on my plan and laying my whole life out in front of me does feel like an incredible privilege.

And it is one for which we physically don’t need much, just a piece of paper, a pen and a computer or phone with an internet connection – if you’re creative enough, pen and paper is really all.

But what we do need is to allow ourselves to take our life into our own hands and to decide and live what is right for us, and to not give that decision up to fate or somebody else.

I know that in my past, I would have been tempted to say, who am I to think I know better what’s right for me than god/the universe/fate.

But when we begin to understand how energy works, we see that what happens to us always depends on how we are and how we see the world and which vibrations we send out into the world.

So, I’d much rather consciously choose mine, and create my world and experiences accordingly, than being left to react to those I’m programmed to reproduce and thus the reality I’m presented with because I created it without even being conscious that I did.

And on this journey we can see everything that comes up in life as a teacher.

One of the things I saw more clearly than ever in the last week, was the fact that every person is a mirror.

If something that another person says or does, makes me feel hurt or offended, it’s because I’ve not yet healed that part of myself.

Once I have, no one has power over me any more and I’m free.

Or a little more free in that area.

And if you don’t believe me, you can easily test that for yourself.

If somebody calls you a coward, for example, and you know yourself well enough to know that’s not true, you can just shrug and move on, and it won’t affect you.

When you’re not sure, however, if they are right or whether what they say is true or not, what they say bothers you.

You don’t trust yourself and your own judgement, and you also don’t know if you can trust them.

If that’s the case, the only way to get out of the uncomfortableness of that feeling is to condemn them, for having interrupted you and your life and to continue as before, until the next time somebody calls you a coward (or anything really), and it makes you insecure again because you still don’t know what to think about it.

Or you can break the circle of uncertainty and examine your life and see who is right about you – and that person obviously should be you – because you’ll be with you for the rest of your life and if you don’t trust yourself, you won’t be able to trust anyone else either.

So it helps us to acknowledge that we’ve clearly hit a blind spot and pause for a second and find out what is really going on.

When we allow ourselves to enter on this journey, of self-discovery, life becomes so much easier and so much more fun and every time we look within, and find an answer, we begin to trust ourselves more.

Now, when you look within, and you find out that they were right, that you are or were acting like a coward, then you can find out why that is, what that really means and if this is how you want to continue to go through life or not.

If you decide it is how you intend to continue to go through life, then all is well, and you can own your cowardliness (or any aspect of you that you are aware of) because you believe it’s the best way for you to be in the world.

And next time someone calls you a coward, you can also just shrug and go on.

Or, if you decide you want to change, all you have to do is decide how you want to react and be the next time that you are in a similar situation and practice that in your mind.

(Really this works, professionals in music and sports and more and more ‘regular‘ people use this all the time – just try it.)

Maybe you are also interested in finding out where your behaviour came from and ready to compassionately meet yourself there, to heal that wound or change that belief where it originated, but this is not necessary for creating a different outcome.

For that, you simply have to decide how you want to react in the future and practice that (in your mind).

And here’s the other thing:

Whether you decide to take responsibility for the situation and find the answer and certainty within, or whether you decide to blame others and continue to run into the same problems, the decision is always yours.

Whatever you decide will, however, determine the course of your life.

And not making a conscious decision is simply deciding to let things go on as they are.

I’ve been asked a couple of times in the recent weeks, if going through life so consciously isn’t exhausting, but my answer is always the same:

It’s much less exhausting to invest the time to find clarity about something and then live with that certainty until we get new information and can make a better decision, than it is going through life wondering if I’m right or wrong, if other people are right or wrong, or what’s right or wrong in general.

And I do also remember the times when I honestly thought other people might know better who I am or what I am, or that they might see something in me that I can’t see or whatever – because I didn’t trust myself to step up for myself and be there for myself.

But this is never true – other people can always just see a reflection of themselves in us, they can’t see things they don’t know from themselves and if they give unsolicited advice – they don’t do it because they are healed and centred in themselves, but driven by ego and want something from us – not necessarily consciously, yet they do.

There is nothing to fear once we know who we are, what we need and like, and where our boundaries are – and learning these things is what we do in the CREATRIX School.

This is the reason why we had a look at our lives and at our death last week.

Because when we look at these things consciously, we take away the fear, and we find the clarity we need to create the lives we want.

That being said, have you ever been up on a mountain or in an aeroplane looking down at the mountains, the lakes, the houses, the rivers, the streets?

Recognizing the structures of the cities we live in, how people are moving in one direction, and then another, the synchronicities of when the lights go on and off and how it seems so much less personal when you’re looking at it from the outside, or above, than when you’re face-to-face with it?

When we create a plan for our lives, when we map it out in front of us and see it all on a piece of paper, we give ourselves the freedom to create our life – instead of letting it run on autopilot.

To decide what we want to have when we die, what we would like to have in the next three years, in the next ten years and this year and then learning how to break it down so that we can start creating what we want RIGHT NOW – sets us free.

If we choose freedom, we do, however, have to put in the work to consciously decide what we want and wish for, and face the reality that we have often decided against ourselves until now.

It does feel like anything is possible, though – because it is.

And you have all it takes.

The only question is, are you ready to face yourself?